The Five Andrews

View Original

Plans for new year to replace current year imposed

Lemonly Realm correspondent, To, reports growing evidence of a new year that has almost completely replaced the year nearly everyone had got used to.

The new year was slipped in on the single most popular night for going out and was hardly noticed by party-goers popping open champagne.

Since the change so few differences have been noticed that the cost of the new year, paid for by taxis, has come into question.

This site argues that, although fares were raised especially to pay for the change, it has yet to be shown whether the benefits outweigh the additional cost of getting home.

We encourage our readers who have already adopted 2014 to consider whether they have simply followed the crowd unthinkingly, so easy as it is to do. 

We therefore stand behind anyone who isn't yet in 2014 but we would ask them to remove any wide-brimmed hat.

We also applaud the growing minority who have a private and opaque calendrical system. Apart from insulating homes, building interfaces so that proliferating, non-standard, private and opaque calendrical systems can meaningfully talk to one another is one of the most effective peaceful ways of growing the GDP.